Tag Archives: relationships

41: Mark Manson on Pick-Up Artists, Monogamy, Materialism, Writing, and Upping the Quality of Your Suffering

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Mark Manson is the author of the well-respected dating book “Models: Attract Women Through Honesty” that espouses honesty, self-discovery, genuine connection with like-minded human beings and… common sense as a way of life and love; we talk about materialism, death, vulnerability, rejection, demographics, self-discovery, writing rituals, etc.

Subscribe to the podcast on iTunes or RSS, and check out our facebook page.

Full Audio of Interview on YouTube

Mark Manson Quotes (from Podcast)

On pick-up artist philosophy:

“Women are complex and it’s an adventure getting to know them and understand them. You can never reduce dating to an algorithm: say this, text her this many times, etc.”

On experience:

“The only way more experience with women can be bad is through the ‘paradox of choice’. If you give people two options, and they choose one, generally they will be happy with what they chose. If you give them 100 options and they choose one, then they are more likely to spend a lot of time worrying that maybe the other 99 options were better, that they missed out.”

On monogamy:

“Monogamy works for most people. What doesn’t work for most people is ’till death do us part’.  The majority of people prefer to stay with one partner at one time. What doesn’t work for the majority is being sexually monogamous with one person for 60+ years. Once you take into account the divorce rate and the infidelity rate, you end up with a small slice of the pie of people who stay faithful to one another their entire lives. A lot of people get bummed out by that idea, but this is something we have to be realistic and honest about. That said, people vary a lot.”

On demographics:

“If you want a woman with different values then you need to live a life based on different values. You can’t go spend money at a strip club and expect a girl from Sunday school to show up on a date with you.”

On writing:

“The first draft is for me. The revision is for the readers.”

On “suffering better”:

“We spend most of our lives focusing on gaining more and more positive experiences, but the quality of our lives is actually determined by our ability to handle negative experiences.”

Links

Full David Foster Wallace Quote

The following is an abridged quote from Infinite Jest by David Foster Wallace that I read to close the podcast:

“If, by the virtue of charity or the circumstance of desperation, you ever chance to spend a little time around a Substance-recovery halfway facility, you will acquire many exotic new facts…That certain persons simply will not like you no matter what you do. That you do not have to like a person in order to learn from him/her/it. That loneliness is not a function of solitude. That logical validity is not a guarantee of truth. That it takes effort to pay attention to any one stimulus for more than a few seconds. That boring activities become, perversely, much less boring if you concentrate intently on them. That if enough people in a silent room are drinking coffee it is possible to make out the sound of steam coming off the coffee. That sometimes human beings have to just sit in one place and, like, hurt. That you will become way less concerned with what other people think of you when you realize how seldom they do. That there is such a thing as raw, unalloyed, agendaless kindness. That concentrating intently on anything is very hard work. That the people to be the most frightened of are the people who are the most frightened. That it takes great personal courage to let yourself appear weak. That no single, individual moment is in and of itself unendurable. That other people can often see things about you that you yourself cannot see, even if those people are stupid. That having a lot of money does not immunize people from suffering or fear. That trying to dance sober is a whole different kettle of fish. That, perversely, it is often more fun to want something than to have it. That if you do something nice for somebody in secret, anonymously, without letting the person you did it for know it was you or anybody else know what it was you did or in any way or form trying to get credit for it, it’s almost its own form of intoxicating buzz. That it is permissible to want. That everybody is identical in their unspoken belief that way deep down they are different from everyone else. That there might not be angels, but there are people who might as well be angels.”

31: Kyle Cerminara and Tim Carpenter on Wrestling, Fighting, Relationships, Honesty, and Selfies

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In episode 31, Tim and I talk with Kyle Cerminara, NCAA All-American wrestler, former wrestling coach at Edinboro University and University of Pennsylvania, professional MMA fighter about training at the Olympic Training Center, Steve Mocco, MySpace, maintaining a relationship while training and competing, Cael Sanderson, what makes an athlete world-class, world championships in jiu jitsu, physical prime, selfies, motivation, extremist personality: all or nothing, oreo cookies, cars, women, chiropractic, acupuncture, sauna, love, physical attraction, jealousy, honesty, etc.

Subscribe to the podcast on iTunes or RSS, and check out our facebook page.

Quotes

Kyle on training intensity at the Olympic Training Center:

“The word ‘break’ and the word ‘overtraining’ are two things I absolutely hate.”

Tim Carpenter on what “love” is not:

“Love is not obsession, insecurity, possession. None of that is love.”

Links

Linda and David Story

The following moral dilemma is discussed on the podcast:

Linda and David love each other very much and wish to see each other.  But they have a problem.  A wide river separates them, David on one side and Linda on the other.

Steven owns the one and only boat that is capable of crossing the river.  Linda goes to him and tells of her plight.  She asks Steven if he will take her across the river in h is boat so she can see her love.  He says that he is willing, but only if she will sleep with him.  Initially, Linda says no, however, later seeing no alternative, she consents.

When Linda arrives at David’s house, she is wracked with guilt, so she tells him all that has happened.  He becomes enraged and throws Linda out of the house.

Linda happens to have a very good friend who also lives on that side of the river and goes to that friend for help, but the friend says, “I’m sorry but I don’t want to get involved,” and sends Linda on her way.

Finally, Linda tells an acquaintance, Michael, what has happened.  He gets angry and returns to David’s house with Linda.  Michael gives David a sound beating.

10: Angela Vogel on Women in Jiu Jitsu, Pastry Grips, and Game of Thrones

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josh-vogel-angela-vogel-podcastIn episode 10, Josh and I talk to Angela Vogel about women in jiu jitsu, Game of Thrones, being married to a black belt, warrior queens, Zenobia, working as a pastry chef, spider-man, knee cut pass, dieting, starting jiu jitsu, dance parties, country songs,  teaching with a focus on transitions, etc.

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Quotes

Angela  on approaching jiu jitsu with confidence:

“Your personality comes out in your jiu jitsu.”

Josh on ignoring belt colors:

“Don’t worry about the belt color, just pretend that everyone you’re rolling with is a white belt. I try to do that with my teachers. I try to pretend like they’re white belts and they still fuck me up but at least I don’t get in my own way.”

Links

YouTube Version

7: Tim Carpenter on Women, Relationships, Iceberg Slim and Pimp Philosophy

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icerberg-slim-women-relationshipsIn episode 7, I talk to Tim Carpenter about Iceberg Slim’s book “Pimp: The Story of My Life”, relationships, furry parties and other sexual perversions, women in jiu jitsu, the decline of  marriage, monogamy, lying, cheating, murder, Facebook, Scarface, gorillas, bonobos, and much more.

Subscribe on iTunes or RSS, and check out the facebook page.

Here are links, videos, book, people, things mentioned in this episode: